I have been having a conversation about the nature of Heaven with a couple of friends recently.
The question comes down to: is Heaven the place where we get what we wanted, or is it that when we get there our desires will be aligned with God to the extent that we don't want the things we can't have.
I have spent a great amount of time in this life wanting things that are impossible for me to have in this world. Sometimes, when the pain of "I can never have that" is too much, I have taken comfort in the idea that maybe it's not never, it's just not here. I have leaned heavily on the idea that if I wait, if I make it to the end of this race, part of the reward will be that I will be able to experience those things that I can't here.
The other idea is that in the completion of our justification and sanctification we are freed from our earthly desires and our desires become one with the desires of God and that is the ultimate reward.
Another way to ask this is, in the day of the resurrection when we rise with our spiritual bodies, as Paul tells us, will my body be male or female? Will I be female and be happy because I have received the thing that I have wanted so desperately, or will I be male and be happy because I no longer want to be female?
I don't think it makes any difference here and now, but I have a hard time finding comfort in the second idea, primarily because I don't understand what it means to talk about me without these desires. To a great extent the desire to be a woman defines who I am, if I don't have that, am I still me?
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